What is your favorite sport?

Question
Dear Cap'n Billy,

What is your favorite sport? Also, what's your parrot's name?
Patrick

Answer
Ahoy Patrick!

Me favorite sport is basketball because you get fowl shots. I loathe parrots and shoot them every chance I get. It's kind of like the way Indiana Jones is afraid of snakes. I hate parrots. They make me skin crawl. Plus, if yer not careful, they'll tell others where you've buried yer treasure.

Instead of a pet parrot, I have a pet bilge rat named Bongo. He's very faithful and even fetches me a mug of grog when I ask. And I've never heard of a bilge rat telling where yer treasure is hidden.

I hate hockey, too, because you get penalized for hooking. You see, I have a hook at the end of me left arm, so I get penalized every other minute.

Happy sailing, and don't let the bilge rats bite,

Cap'n Billy "The Butcher" MacDougall
Author, Guide to Pirate Parenting
http://www.pirateparenting.com/