How much gun powder?

Question:
Dear Cap'n Billy,

How much gun powder should I put in my cannon? Also, what should I aim at?

Signed,

A confused parent

Answer:
Dear Ms. Confused,

Your two questions are related. If you're shooting at something big, say a dinosaur, use more gun powder. If you're trying to keep a squirrel off your bird feeder, you should tone down the amount of powder a bit.

I can't tell you what to aim at. Just be careful about shooting at things that can shoot back, like bigger ships or a royal navy fleet.

Happy sailing and don't let the bilge rats bite,

Cap'n Billy