How much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Question:
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Robert, who has a woodchuck in his yard

Answer:
Ahoy Robert!

Pirates hate woodchucks -- at least pirates with wooden legs, like me, hate woodchucks. They always be sniffing around our legs with a hungry gleam in thar eyes.

To answer yer question, the last woodchuck that came near me wooden leg didn't chuck any wood because I stabbed 'em with me dagger. Then I served 'em to the crew. Yum.

Happy sailing and don't let the bilge rate (or woodchucks) bite,

Cap'n Billy the Butcher